[vc_row][vc_column width=”1/1″][vc_column_text]
Polyamorous Relationships – More Than Two
Guest Post By Daniel R. Sullivan, MA, LPC, NCC
The concept of monogamy is one with which we all are familiar. Monogamy is the practice of two individuals drawn to each other emotionally/sexually/romantically entering into a relationship where each has committed to single partner interaction.
The two individuals connect singly to each other forsaking all others on an emotional/sexual/romantic level.Thus, as observed in many societies many individuals commit to monogamy.
Is Monogamy for Everyone?
[/vc_column_text][vc_single_image image=”785″ alignment=”center” style=”vc_box_rounded” border_color=”grey” img_link_target=”_self” img_size=”large” link=”http://www.couplestherapychicago.net”][vc_column_text]In a society where monogamy is viewed from a lofty, morally superior perspective, labeling all others as cheaters or promiscuous, do individuals set themselves up for failure and disappointment? Perhaps in honoring personal choice it is time we begin to value the plethora of relationship styles including polyamory, the love of more than one.
Non-Monogamous Relationships
As I work with individuals, couples, and other relationship styles the first thing I tell them is that the concept of a normative relationship does not exist.
So, take everything you have heard or seen and throw it out because that imaginary relationship box established by a monogamous-focused society does not exist. Now envision what you desire your relationship to look like, and let us begin to design your relationship from that perspective.[/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1/1″][vc_single_image image=”792″ alignment=”center” style=”vc_box_rounded” border_color=”grey” img_link_target=”_self” img_size=”full” link=”http://www.couplestherapychicago.net”][vc_column_text]Kinsey Institute Polyamory Archive founder Dr. Ken Haslam, coined the phrase designer relationships as a way of describing alternative relationships, those relationships that do not fit into the societal narrow focus (SFGate.com, 2014). Polyamory is simply another way for people to construct a mutually consensual relationship without limit or constrain in a design of their choice, without preconceived monogamous centric limits.
Chicago Polyamorous Counseling
In the past several years, I have had the privilege of working with several polyamorous relationships. What I have found is in the beginning of therapy individuals are often afraid to approach the topic of their deeply committed relationship with more than one partner for fear of rejection. In a society, which rejects any relationship other than monogamy, partnering with more than one individual is often misunderstood.
Yet, as once presented with the idea that there is value all relational styles, individuals have been able to move through their healing process less burdened or afraid of just one more societal rejection.
Perhaps it is time we begin to think outside of the non-existent fairy-tale relationship box and simply understand that not all individuals in society were meant to be monogamous.
Give thought to the possibility of non-hierarchical love relationships with more than one person as valid and offer support rather than judgment to those who love more than one.
Daniel R. Sullivan, MA, LPC, NCC
References
Partners in Passion Goes Viral on AlterNet. (2014, June 16). . Retrieved June 19, 2014, from
http://www.sfgate.com/default/article/Partners-in-Passion-Goes-Viral-on-Alternet-5560547.php.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_raw_html]JTNDY2VudGVyJTNFJTNDc2NyaXB0JTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTIwc3JjJTNEJTIyaHR0cCUzQSUyRiUyRnN0YXRpYy5wb2xsZGFkZHkuY29tJTJGcCUyRjgxMzgzMDUuanMlMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0UlMEElM0Nub3NjcmlwdCUzRSUzQ2ElMjBocmVmJTNEJTIyaHR0cCUzQSUyRiUyRnBvbGxkYWRkeS5jb20lMkZwb2xsJTJGODEzODMwNSUyRiUyMiUzRUhhdmUlMjB5b3UlMjBldmVyJTIwYmVlbiUyMGluJTIwbG92ZSUyMHdpdGglMjB0d28lMjBwZW9wbGUlMjBhdCUyMG9uZSUyMHRpbWUlM0YlM0MlMkZhJTNFJTNDJTJGbm9zY3JpcHQlM0UlM0MlMkZjZW50ZXIlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][vc_raw_html]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[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column][/vc_row]